The Sweet Side of Suffering

"It is the fact that there can be true sweetness in the midst of some of our deepest human pain that is so amazing. It may hurt so bad. But it can also hurt so good." -The Sweet Side of Suffering

I recently took a trip to the local Barns & Noble in desperate need of a Christian book to help guide me out of my sadness and into "better" days. Wondering through the Christian Life section like a lost puppy dog, I finally gave up trying to find the perfect book and asked a manager if she could recommend any books about getting over a breakup. Almost instantaneously, she pointed me in the direction where I could have first pointed myself; "self-help and psychology". I let her do her job and show me books like "The Seven Steps to Getting Over a Broken Heart" or "How to Help Yourself Achieve Happiness".

Although the temptation was great to buy a book written by some successful psychologist who probably had some great advice, I knew it wasn't what I needed. I thanked her for her help, (realizing she couldn't really help me at all) and started walking toward the door when something caught my eye.

The title was striking, but intriguing to me, so I picked it up out of curiosity and began to skim the back of the book. The Sweet Side of Suffering: Recognizing God's Best When Facing Life's Worst. 

It was like the Lord had hand picked the book especially for me.

When I got home later on that night, I opened the book and didn't close it until nearly 2 hours and dozens of highlighted quotes later.

M. Esther Lovejoy, the author of The Sweet Side of Suffering, wrote a chapter called "The Sweetness of His Care". In this chapter she talks about all of the different ways that the Lord has provided for her over the years - some of the most astounding words I have ever read.

In one such story, Lovejoy mentions how the Lord provided for her even when she did not think she needed it. You see, she used to be a pastor's wife and was recently divorced, living alone and receiving a small check from her ex-husband and working on the side. She was doing well for herself, had a dependable job and a stable income. Then one day she got a check for a substantial amount of money from a friend . . . and a few weeks later she caught mononucleosis and was laid off at work.

There was another one I read about how she had little money to buy new things, even things like towels. Her and her husband were hosting a pastor to stay at their house while he did missions work in the area. The thread-bare towels her family had used were good enough for them, but she thought it was quite embarrassing to offer them to a guest. So a few days before the pastor was supposed to come to their home, she asked the Lord to provide for her need, whispering to Him that yellow towels were her heart's desire. The very next day in church Lovejoy was handed a bag full of brand new towels by an elderly lady. Not only were they new, but they were yellow!

It's stories like these and many more that had me in tears while reading about the sweetness of the Lord's care in this lady's life. Mostly because it was just straight up amazing to see the miracles of the Lord and to watch Him answer prayer, but also because it amazed me how intimate of a relationship this lady had with Him. She asked the Lord for things that I feel like I could never ask Him for- things like yellow towels and something to brighten a gloomy day. This lady had faith in her God, and she trusted that her God could and would take care of her.

Sometimes as Christians I feel like we act like the Lord cannot be summoned, like He cannot be bothered for things that we often desire, and truly need. Like the Lord is only to be praised, not to be used as an ATM. However this is not the case at all.

The sweetness of our God is something that is priceless. It's always there, but we seldom recognize it. I didn't understand this intimacy with the Lord until recently when I gave up trying to understand why! Why God allows what He allows. Why God seems to leave me all alone. Why His will is so difficult to understand. And then in the midst of my suffering, my small insecurities that I am so fearful of, in the times of brokenness and hurting, I began to see the sweet side to my suffering; I saw the Lord's compassion and a picture that is much bigger than myself.

When you're at your worst, it is the smallest blessings that can change your attitude. It's having a friend ask you to lunch, or a random person telling you you're beautiful. It's the ability to eat . . . at all. Enjoying a conversation with a stranger. An unplanned night of fellowship.

But sometimes, and these are the times that are the hardest, sometimes there are the times when the Lord just wants you to be alone. And it is in these times when I have seen the Lord in my suffering. When I have questioned His goodness and begged for His grace. When I have cried over a loss, but have realized how much I have gained. When I have prayed for a mustard seed and have been given a mountain. When my faith is weak, but His power is strong.

If it had not been for these times . . . for these precious times of grieving, there would not be growth, nor intimacy. I could not be able to see the Lord's comfort and His sovereignty in my life.

Oh the sweet side of suffering. "Because of His love, WE ARE NOT CONSUMED! For His compassion never fails!" Lamentations 3:22. Because of His love we are not consumed by the fire, by the hurting and the pain. Because of Jesus' love, we cannot be torn down by the evil in this world. We are not consumed by grief, but broken for a purpose. Broken to be built back up and put together again. Everything that goes up must come down, and the sunshine has to come out after it rains. We will not grieve forever, and the pain will subside. And when it does, we may know that we have been fixed by the Lord, and we are closer to being made whole. That our suffering was not done in vain.

"Come, let us return to the Lord; for He has torn us that He may heal us! He has struck us down that he may bind us up!" Hosea 6:1